Need a rest from change?
Is anyone else struggling with the change of season? I don’t just mean the weather as it cools and life begins to move indoors again after the freedom of the longer, warmer days of summer. I’m talking about the shift in routine, responsibilities and new rhythms. I have noticed how I am dragging myself back to the work that I find so fulfilling. Odd. Interesting. Whenever something isn’t immediately clear, it is an opportunity to reflect and dig deeper. What new insight am I being offered to discover? So I have been reflecting on why I am experiencing a resistance to the current changes in my life, what I can learn and how to thrive within it.
I lived years ago in an equatorial African country that had no change of seasons and was constantly hot throughout the year. Although a lover of the sun, it was interesting to note that after many months of constant heat and sweat, I missed the cool and longed for the comfort of a thicker duvet. Perhaps partly due to that experience, I have come to enjoy the variety of the seasons and look for lessons offered in creation. The rhythm of the seasons carries subtle wisdom. There is much to learn from nature as a metaphor for the transitions we each face in our lives, whether personal, social, or spiritual. Each shift and season change reminds us that life is not static but in motion. That brings with it new challenges and also opportunities. So, knowing this, and my love of variety and difference, it is intriguing to me that now, this particular change of season is more of a challenge to me. What am I discovering?
Acknowledge and Notice
In times of transition, it is tempting to rush ahead, seeking certainty and stability; but an essential part of navigating change is pausing to acknowledge where we are.
Change often stirs emotions—grief, fear, anticipation or restlessness, excitement and hope. Pausing to notice these kinds of feelings is not to be overcome by them but to allow them space. Only when we acknowledge our discomfort with change can we do something about it. By listening to ourselves in this way, we can gain more resilience as we acknowledge these emotions as natural companions during transition.
In my pausing to reflect on my feelings, I have been able to gain agency over the aspects within change that it is possible to influence. Namely my thoughts about the process. Seasons of change can bring about the sense of being out of control so it is good to focus on what is in my control.
- I can pause.
- I can breathe deeply.
- I can be alert to my thoughts.
- I can change my thoughts.
- I can alter my state of mind.
Change Takes Energy
Experiences of change (even positive) take up our emotional energy and we get tired. So it is important to be aware of the need for extra self-care during our times of transition. We need energy for the processing and adaptation. Adjusting to new roles, environments, or ways of being does not occur without cost.
Recognizing that change takes energy allows us to treat transitions with respect rather than frustration. Too often we expect ourselves to ‘handle it’ without adjusting our pace. Growth and reorientation require physical, mental, and emotional resources.
So as I have acknowledged the extra energy I am using to process, I reach out for support, and I recalibrate my expectations so I am not depleted.
Letting Go
In Autumn trees release their leaves. This time of reflection has reminded me of the natural benefits of letting go. In times of change it is normal to want to keep the familiar but clinging to what has run its course can weigh us down, instead of making space for new growth.
This could be releasing outdated expectations of ourselves or forgiving someone who hurt us. It could mean accepting that a certain plan or dream is no longer aligned with who we are. By loosening our grip and allowing the natural ebb and flow of life, we create the space for something new to arrive. One of the changes I face is the transition of my eldest child from home to university. A loss, a change and a sadness; but also it is natural and healthy and I am excited to watch them adapt and flourish as they step into more responsibility and growth.
The beauty of letting go lies in trusting that when one season ends, another emerges. Just as fresh growth will one day return to bare branches. Understanding this rhythm can help us embrace the unknown with more courage and grace.
Welcome
After the letting go, the acknowledgment, and the energy expended toward adapting, the final invitation is to open ourselves to what is arriving. To welcome does not mean we always feel ready! It means trusting that we can hold space for what emerges, even when it is unfamiliar.
Welcoming change means greeting it with curiosity instead of fear. What opportunities might be hidden within this new chapter? What parts of ourselves might grow stronger?
The act of welcome transforms change from something imposed upon us into a conscious embrace. And this is really important when we feel change leaves us somewhat out of control. It turns uncertainty into possibility. Even as the new season challenges us, it also gifts us the chance to start again, to find beauty in a different rhythm of life, and to receive what we could not have imagined before.
The change of season is one of life’s gentle but powerful teachers. It reminds us to let go with grace, to pause and acknowledge what has been, to respect the energy transformation requires, and to meet the new with openness. In the same way the natural world cycles endlessly through beginnings and endings, so too do our lives unfold in transitions.
So I practise gratitude in this change of season:
- I‘m grateful that I have taken time to notice and name my feelings
- I’m grateful that I am aware that even in change, I can influence what stays the same for my well-being.
- I’m grateful that I have the privilege of slowing down and preserving my energy.
- I’m grateful that I can let go of what doesn’t serve me.
- I’m grateful that I’m looking for the blessings of the season.
Transformational Questions:
- What do I acknowledge about this season in my life?
- What am I holding on to that no longer serves me?
- What familiar routines give me stability as I navigate other changes?
- What opportunities might be hidden within this new chapter?
- What can I be thankful for?
My Standing at the Crossroads coaching package provides the opportunity for you to take time to discover elements of change and transition and recognise hurdles to your destination. I offer the support and framework you need to consider all aspects of a decision resulting in clarity and confidence. Crossroads Coaching brings your unique path into focus and raise your confidence in the choices you make. Do reach out to me so I can join you on your journey.
If you have found benefit from reading this, please share with your friends and network.
If you would like to explore this further in a coaching context please contact Anna at digdeepdreambig@gmail.com
